She Turned Down Her Brother’s Fiance’s Bridesmaid Request, And Doesn’t Understand Why The Other Woman Thinks They Have To Be Friends (2024)

Making friends is one of those things that has no formula, and typically happens organically over time – at least, it does with the very best ones.

Sometimes, we can be friendly and respectful and nothing ever grows beyond that.

This woman doesn’t see friendship happening with her soon-to-be sister-in-law, and she’s not sure there’s anything wrong with that.

Let’s find out what went down!

My (26F) brother James (27M) recently got engaged to his fiancée Laura (32F).

My brother and I have always been super close, throughout the years he had many girlfriends and I generally made it a point to get along with them.

She’s made an effort to get to know all of her brother’s girlfriends, and doesn’t see friendship in her future with this one.

I liked the vast majority of them so that task wasn’t that hard, I had good and close relationships with most of them while they were still dating James, and remain in close contact with 2 even after their breakup (with James permission, of course).

One being his high school gf Diane (26F), and the second one being his baby mom Sofie (29F).

When James started dating Laura 2 years ago I also tried to get close to her but I just couldn’t bring myself to befriend her.

Laura and I are completely different people and have little to nothing in common, she isn’t a bad person by any means but just not someone I would want to hang out with or talk to on a day to day basis.

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It’s fine; she doesn’t hate her or anything there’s just no spark.

At the end of the day she made James happy, and was a decent step mom to my nephew Rio (4M), so me liking her as a person wasn’t really important.

I also had little to no interactions with her, since whenever I visited James at their apartment she would claim she was too busy to hang out with us, so I would mostly only see her during family reunions/holidays.

So, when she asked her to be a bridesmaid, she turned her down.

After they got engaged Laura asked me to be her bridesmaid,

I refused since I already had a part in the wedding as the grooms sister, was happy with my current position and didn’t feel like spending thousands to go on a bachelorette trip where I didn’t know anyone.

Things escalated when the fiance learned she’d agreed to be the maid-of-honor for one of her brother’s ex-girlfriends.

Last month James ex Diane also got engaged and asked me to be her maid of honor.

I agreed since Diane has been a close friend of mine for years and I was honored that she wanted me to have such an important role in her wedding.

When Laura heard about this she called me saying that I was really immature for rejecting her request to be a bridesmaid but agreeing to be Diane’s maid of honor.

I told her that Diane was my childhood friend so it was different, Laura then began to interrogating me and asked if Diane and James were the ones getting married would I also refuse her request and be content with only being the grooms sister in the wedding party.

I told her that that situation was irrelevant since it’ll never happen, Laura continued to bombard me with questions before I finally told her that as her future SIL my only obligation towards her is to treat her with respect and I’m already doing that, so I don’t understand what more can she want from me.

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She doesn’t think she did or said anything wrong or hurtful.

After hearing that Laura ended the call and blocked my number.

Her friends are now harassing me and telling me how awful I am for saying that to Laura.

I’m genuinely confused since I don’t think I’ve said anything remotely awful or offensive, but I might be missing something.

AITA?

This seems like a lot of unnecessary drama.

I wonder what Reddit is going to say!

The top comment says maybe she should talk to her brother.

This person doesn’t think the SIL is very mature.

Actions like this could definitely spell trouble.

But this person thinks she should think more long term.

This commenter can see the SIL’s side, too.

Sometimes friendship is just not in the cards.

You have to just be an adult about it and move on.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.